Friday, October 2, 2009

i just applied for graduation

news: i will be graduating in april of 2010. that's 6.5 months. this feels soooo good.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Women's Services Part Deux

This post made alot of readers angry/insulted. I wrote about two Women's Services posters that I found offensive and asserted my concern as to why there isn't a parallel "Men's Services" to for Men to help their wives with issues that are socially rampant. The already existing version is for "Loved Ones With Pornography Problems". I proposed a "Loved Ones with Eating Disorders", held in a Men's Services. I feel differently, today, about my harsh statements about it being a "men's" problem and not a "woman"'s. Partly, because I think that this whole thing is extremely gendered anyway. Men have eating disorders and woman look at porn too. So, that I retract. And also because it read as an attack on the bond of marriage. But, I still stand by my feelings about these issues being systemic to a culture of perfection. I know nothing about the treatments/therapy that goes on in Women's Services. I am talking about core issues-why are these so prevalent? That's what interests me. If we can talk about the cultural issues and the problems stemming from them, then we can start to turn this thing around.

Friday, July 31, 2009


heard on the radio: ", we've been hearing alot of talk about V, W, and U recessions. can you explain a little about each one?"

"yes. thanks for having me on the a V shaped recession is more of a sharp drop, with a sharp climb up with no sight of a drop off..."

"and a W?"

"well, a W, is a sharp drop, followed by a steep incline followed by another sharp drop, followed of course by another steep incline. many people are predicting this recession will follow this "W" plan, although of course, there is much debate and discourse over this..."

"and a U shape. talk about the U.."

"well the U shape, first off I would like to add that I personally think that this is what we should expect from this recession, but in any case, a U shape is a long, steady drop, followed by sort of a slow, gradual rise, with no apparent signs of a downfall..."

now, i personally believe in the "L" recession where we drop and glide until 2012. and then we die.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

holey matrimony

much to the chagrin of my employers, i love voodoo doughnuts. there's something about combining santeria with baked goods that just absolutely tickles me. what i didn't realize was that shop doubles as a wedding chapel. you can tie the knot under the "holey donut" and it's legit. at a price of $300 you get: a wedding, a voodoo priest to perform it, and donuts/coffee for 6 apres nuptuals. i've changed my mind on marriage-if i can get married under a big donut, AND it's legit-then marriage is for me.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

if you are old enough to buy it...

amazing. truly amazing and true story.

yesterday, i waited on a fine pair of hipsters. greasy hair, carefully placed. plastic sunglasses, ironic tattoos and high-waist shorts to boot. except for the dude. he had cutoffs.

so they walked in the restaurant with a brown bag, and me being the intuitive and slightly seasoned server that I am, I knew exactly what to do. i grabbed my cork opener, 2 buffed wine glasses and a serving napkin. prepared as i was for the wine service, I wasn't prepared for what was to happen.

i set down the wine glasses and ask "may i see your i.d.?" and what i got in return were glares, a sigh, and then a flash of a 1985 and a 1984. the latter was all i needed. they should have saved their breath.

but, i plunged forward with the service. the two decided to put their wine on ice for a while, before opening, and when i came back with an ice bucket i noticed that there was no sticker on the bottle. (legally, we cannot open wine without that sticker) i asked why there wasn't a sticker and they responded that "the law changed and stickers aren't being used anymore." wierd, i thought. all of our wine bottles still have stickers. but, i still wanted to serve it to them (but knew i couldn't legally without that sticker), so i asked them if they could tell me where they bought it so i could verify. i was met with a blank stare and a "can i just order while YOU figure this out?!"

we're almost there. as i walked back into the restaurant to talk to my boss, i could see the fumes coming out of her grease-laden ears. after weighing the issue, my boss decided to let me serve it to them. i return to the table to tell them the good news and i see only the guy. as i tell him that we will serve it to them and that " i am sorry for the trouble", i see it....the girl...sitting on the curb, pouting with her head in her hands.

maybe i read the i.d. wrong. was is 1994? 2004? because i sure as hell don't serve alcohol to children.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

waiting tables

a while back, i wrote a blog rant about proper manners in a restaurant. i will be posting the "best of's" periodically and some new encounters as well.

this was from a few years back when i worked at abbey road pub:

"i went up to my table of four ladies (i use that term loosely) and asked them if they wanted to go ahead and cash out right then. one of the ladies, clad in an oversized tie-dye tank top reminding me of why i hate tourists and "deadheads", proceeded to tell me "not yet", because she hadn't finished picking her teeth. needless to say i was rather dodgy when i later took the receipt and cash from her hands."